Stop the world, I wanna get off!!!

Ever feel like you've pissed off all the Gods at one time? I guess if I'm gonna do it, I may as well do it right, right?? So, once you've successfully pissed them off, how exactly do you make them happy again?

It all started going south yesterday when I finally gave in and let my grumpy old man (a/k/a my 15 yr old cat, Bear) be taken to the vet. He has been sick, and I've known this, but I always hate taking him in cause they always give me bad news. But I decided to do what was right for a change and we made an appt for him, Momma T's grumpy old man, Tommy, and my black lab Tawne. Poor Tawne has always had issues. She pees when she sleeps so that definitely needed to be taken care of. I knew it was going to be somewhat expensive and was not looking forward to that. But, I was blown away when I found out the total! OMG! It was more than I pay for my own office visits for pete's sake! I had obviously angered the pet Gods somehow!

As I am on the phone getting financially raped by the vet, I get an email from one of my bosses saying, I need to talk to you after five. Beautiful! You just gotta love getting that message. Of course I promptly respond back and say, um, ok, but if your going to fire me, do it now cause I aint staying late to get fired!!! And all I wanted to do was go home. I was exhausted. I had only slept a couple of hours the night before and I really reallly wanted to just go home and crawl into bed. But NOOOO!!!! Guess the Sleep God was angered! I promptly walk over to the boss's office at 5p only to find the big boss siting in there chatting away. I got to wait til almost 5:45p to talk. Time God evidently pissed! Of course she promptly tells me news that makes me oh so not happy. Of course I can't repeat it here yet cause its not public knowledge yet and not 100% confirmed. All I know is it will not be happiness. Obviously angered the Work God.

Finally I am on the way home and decided to crank up the music and just jam. I was rocking and rolling and just a swinging to the music. You should have seen the looks I was getting. And you know what, I didnt' even care. I was jamming to the song Crazy Bitch by Buckcherry. If you haven't heard it, OMG, its hillarious. There is no way you can sit still while listening to it. Definitely my theme song. I guarantee you there are several people that think I'm definitely a Crazy Bitch!! I make it home where I get asked a question befitting the whole day. Do you want a margarita, Momma asks!!! Well hell yeah I reply. Thank God she understands me. Off to my favorite mexican food joint for my favorite amaretto margarita. Man are they stout! Fantastic. Starting to feel better. I make it home to crawl into bed, but of course, I have to stop and check email first. Stupid me. Nothing like drunking emailing. Never seems to work out well. That must be the email Gods now.

This morning I get up thinking surely today will be better right? Its a fresh new day. A brand new start. WRONG! It was cute that I thought that though huh??? Along comes the angry Traffic God. During my lovely hour drive to work, I got into three, count them, three, altercations. And seriously, only one was my fault. Michelle as my witness. She was on the phone with me the entire drive in listening to me explain all the beautiful things that transpired the day before. My pet peeve, slow drivers in the fast lane. AAARRGGHHH! I got behind this guy that was just putting along in the fast lane, the cars in front of him miles ahead. So, I put my blinker on and got in the middle lane and started to go around. Well, that obviously made him mad so he started to speed up. But, Chevy Tahoe versus POS. Which do you thnk won? hehehe I was approaching a dump truck so I popped over in front of the guy. Now he was mad. He finally came up next to me again, and just glared at me. I laughed and promptly started smiling and waiving and telling him that I hoped he had a great day. Michelle is laughing now telling me I've lost my mind. This guy must have driven past me and glared at least three times. and all three times, I smiled and waved and wished him a nice day which seemed to make him glare harder. So now I decide okay, time to move from the fast lane into the middle lane. I put my little blinker on, and move on over. I'm minding my own business, ranting away on the phone, when this lovely little hispanic guy decides he wants my lane, and he wants it NOW. Nevermind the fact that um, I'm using it!!! He almost side swiped me. Full side impact. So, I honk cause surely he didn't mean to come over right? He promptely starts cussing me and telling me to get off the phone. I'm sorry, but what did me being on the phone have to do with him being a dumbass? Maybe he has a phone phobia. Really not sure. So of course I start cussing back and he pulls in behind me and tries to see if his little car would fit up my tahoe's ass. So hey, being the accomodating person that I am, I proceed to stop quickly to help him find out. I mean really, he obviously needs this information for some reason right? Of course, Michelle is getting a play by play of the action and thinking great, I get to hear a murder. Well, at least she could say that I didn't start it. I had my witness dangit! I might be dead, but dammit I was right. Make sure that's on my tomb stone okay? :-)

He finally goes away. I am pulling into my building area and think, OMG, its almost over, I'm almost to the parking garage. I turn onto the street in front of my building and coming straight at me, in my lane, is yet another car. Oh for pete's sake. I just stopped in the middle of the road and started laughing. Surely this could not be happening right? Finally the genius realizes, oh, hey, I'm on the wrong side of the road!!! Dee ta dee! ya think? Good lord.

Finally Im safe and sound and work. Of course with all the info I got the night before, work is just giong so well. So lunch comes around and the other secretary says, lets get out of here. So I of course say, okay, but YOU drive. She decides she wants Whataburger so off we go. Whatever. at this point I dont care. We get in her car, and her a/c doesn't work. Great. Off to a good start. We proceed to the nearest whataburger and turn down this road that ends up being a dead end. Beautiful. We turn around to get to another road, and guess what.......a Train!!! woo hoo! Welcome to my day. I just had to laugh.

Finally it gets to be the end of the day and dang it, I'm going home. I get in my truck and think hopefully it will start! Oh, did I mention that my truck was not running right this morning either??? I really thought it was giong to die sitting in traffic. Now that would be fun huh? Anyway. I left work at 6:15p and though well, at least traffic will be gone. WRONG again! go figure. Dam Traffic God must really be pissed. Almost an hour and a half later, i finally make it home. So here I sit, already in my jammies, curled up in my bed and about to pull the covers up over my head.

There are so many other little things that went wrong the last couple of days that I just have to sit here and laugh. Its so sad its comical. Of course, maybe I'm laughing cause I've finally lost it. Oh well. Its funny anyway.

So heres to tomorrow being a better day. Maybe some of the Gods have gone fishing and will be in a better mood. If nothing else, you just have to laugh and say okay, NEXT!!

Road Trip!!!

Sitting quietly on the couch on a lazy Saturday, watching the food network.........all of a sudden, an idea you saw on TV hits you. The dh saw this show that was featuring an authentic New York style diner here in our little home state. And surprisingly enough, its only about an hour or two away! Being from New York originally, (he got here as fast as he could!!!) this sounded like a fantastic idea for lunch. So we grab Momma T and out the door we go.

Evidently on the way to the fire field in College Station, we've all passed this place, but never really thought twice about it. Just a little whole-in-the-wall joint. Of course now it proudly displays a neon flashing sign that says "As seen on the Food Network". We pull into the parking lot and go inside. It is so cute!!! Just like an old street side diner you might actually find on the streets of New York.

We each got something different so we could test out a few items, and OMG! It was wonderful. We started off with some chedder cheese fries, which is fries and cheddar cheese layerd and topped with bacon with a side of ranch. Wow. that was fantastic! The dh was in hog heaven. For anyone interested, the link for this place is: http://www.hullabaloodiner.com/ Everything was really good.

With full bellies, we got back in the car to head back home. We took the senic drive back and drove through Washington on the Brazos State Park and a few other places. It was so nice and so relaxing and peaceful. The weather even held out and didn't rain until after we got home. Of course once we got home, we realized we needed a few things from Walmart so back in the car me and Momma go. Think we wore the poor dh out.

Three hours later we finally make it back home. I still have no idea how we spent that long at Walmart!! After watching Carlos Mincia, I finally decided it was time to take my tired butt to bed. it was WAY passed my bedtime.

but what a fantastic way to spend the day. I LOVE road trips and trying new places. I suggest if anyone gets the chance, check this place out. Its really very good.

Dentist

So I got the priviledge of getting to go to a brand new dentist today. I've been living with a broken crown for oh, about a year and a half now and decided it was definitely time to go get it fixed. Especially before I leave for vacation to Orlando at the end of the month!!! Procrastination is a beautfiul thing and a skill I have mastered to perfection. I got the name of a dentist from my boss and proceeded to set up my appointment for today. Luckily its in the building right next to where I work.

I walk across the street to the doctor's office and sit in the waiting room waiting to be called. As i am sitting there, I saw this young boy come out who had evidently gotten a crown himself and I think hmmmm...this shouldn't be too bad. If he can afford this dentist, it should be okay right? so he meets up with who I thought might be his father. Well, was I mistaken. The older gentleman that was sitting in there was this kid's driver!!!! Holy cow I think! Maybe I should run while I could still afford what i was wearing!!! Wow was that a bad sign. That kid could not have been half my age and he is there with a driver. Amazing.

And did you know they longer have to give you the injections to numb you now? They can now do it via a computer!!! Dang! Has it been that long since I've been to the dentist??? Three hours later, I am the proud owner of a brand new temporary crown and a much lighter checkbook.

Did I mention that I hate dentists?? I just got through paying for the last round of dental work GEEZ. Thank God I live with a good druggie!!!!! she's got me all doped up now and I dont have a care in the world!!! That rocks. Now I can just go to sleep and dream of fishing.................

Hope everyone has a fantastic fourth of july!!!!

Memories

Have you ever noticed how memories always have a way of sneaking in when you really aren't thinking about it? Even ones that you didn't even remember you had. Like a certain smell that may bring back a thought of something that happened or of something that was said, or of a certain event. I've been finding that alot lately for some reason. I'll be doing something and then all of a sudden, a memory that had been supressed in the back of my mind, comes rushing forward. Its amazing how much information is stored in our little pea brains. Alot of Cheryl memories have been coming to mind lately. Maybe that is her way of saying that she is still here with me. I guess if that is the only way I can have her with me, I'll take it. Makes me happy to think of her even though it also makes me sad because I miss her.

I've learned though.........everything happens for a reason. And sometimes we find out why things happen, but then sometimes we don't. I sure wish I knew why she had to leave us and what I'm supposed to learn though. But in time, I suppose I will learn.

I would also like to ask for your prayers for my uncle who was put in the hospital on Friday. He's had a series of ailments, the last of which was cancer. He has been cancer free for awhile now, but his heart is now giving him troubles. Please keep him and my aunt in your thoughts and prayers. They fought so hard through the cancer to get where they are now.

Cancer.........its such an ugly word.

Reality

Have you ever noticed how reality has a way of sneaking up on you and slapping you in the face with brutal force before you are aware of what is about to happen?? You go through time with blinders on and then, all of sudden, reality is standing right there laughing at you. Amazing really. Cause once you look back, all the signs were there, you just didn't see it. Or you just chose to ignore it. Of course, once reality slaps you, all you can do is stand there and go DOH! Oh well. End that chapter and move on right? Think I'll just take up fishing.



Things have finally started calming down a bit after Cheryl's death. The whole thing still seems so surreal. I still want to pick up the phone and call her. At least I know I can still talk to her and I am still in contact with my extended family, so I guess that will have to suffice. Not a day goes by that I don't think of her though.

We've also been getting Momma T moved in to her new home which she now shares with ME!! YEAH! Its so great having her and Cam there. She is the best housewife ever. She cooks, she cleans, everything. Its wonderful. If she ever decides to leave, I'm just gonna have to pack up and go with her. I get Tina tea anytime I want it!! What more can a girl ask for??? They have really made it hard though to shrink into my little cocoon and feel sorry for myself and sit around and think about Cheryl. That's been such a blessing. Life is never dull with them around. It was amazing how quiet, quiet was when Cam was gone. Too quiet really.

All the animals have finally begun to mesh together and realize that not a dang one of them are going anywhere. As much as they would probably like it if some of them left, they have come to the realization that that is just not going to happen. Looks like we've switched dogs though. Jake sleeps with me and the dh and Tawne and Bailey sleep with Tina and Cam. Which works out great for us considering Jake prefers to sleep on the floor whereas T and B like the bed! I think we got the better end of that deal!!!

Everything is starting to level out now so lets hope that the rest of 2007 is ALOT better than the first half!!!

9:35 p.m. Monday, June 11, 2007

Well, just upon completion of my last entry, I got the phone call that I have been dreading. Cheryl is gone. Her long hard struggling battle is now complete. She passed away at 9:35 p.m. this evening. I knew this was coming, I expected it, and as soon as my phone rang at 10:45 p.m., I knew what was coming............but it still came as a shock. I'm in the middle of having a complete breakdown, so I will have to finish this later. I just wanted everyone to know.

RIP -- Cheryl Ree Tomaski

July 29, 1947 - June 11, 2007

I love you big as heaven and I will miss you every day of the rest of my life. You took a big piece of my heart with you. I will hopefully see you on the other side.

Cheryl

For those of you that don't know, this is my Cheryl. My second Mom, and one of the most dearest, sincerest people I have ever known. She has been a huge influence and an even greater inspiration in my life. We worked together for what seemed like an eternity and formed a very deep bond. The first week she was at our office, my old boss, Ray, asked her, Cheryl, why do you always wear those long shirts? And without missing a beat, Cheryl said, Ray, its called camouflage.....to hide my ass. I knew I loved her from that moment on. You should have seen the look on Ray's face as we all laughed hysterically. She was always there to give me advice, hold my hand, make me laugh, or just plain listen. She never met a stranger. You could put her in a room by herself and I swear she could get the wall to talk to her. And you can bet that within five minutes, she'd be showing that wall all of her beautiful grandchildren's pictures. You could tell her anything and everything and nothing at all would surprise her. I think she had probably heard it all and seen it all. And what is even more impressive is that she never judged you. She'd make you laugh and cry all in a matter of five minutes. Her laughter was so contagious. She'd get to laughing like crazy and out came a snort and you couldn't help but bust a gut laughing. That would make her laugh even harder and snort even louder. Our office was just not the same when she decided to retire and spend more time with the love of her life and her loving family. In hindsight, that was the best thing she ever did. I'll never forget the time I heard this loud crash in her office followed by this loud snorting laughter with an "I'm okay" coming out in between. Cheryl had fallen out of her chair and some how the chair had ended up on top of her. Nobody was more amused than Cheryl.

As most of you know, she has been fighting a long hard downhill battle with cancer. She fought bavely and valiantly. She is now nearing the end of her battle. Unfortunatly, the cancer is going to win. I had the hardest phone call today. Her daughter called me and told me this was the end, but that Cheryl was holding on possibly to say goodbye to the people she didn't really get a chance to. Natalie asked me to tell her goodbye and let her know that it was okay for her to go. How do you say that when its not okay? I don't want her to go. But that is extremely selfish of me, so I sucked it up and said the hardest words I have ever had to say. I told her I loved her and that it was time for her to go. That we would all be okay and she could let go and be with God. Do you know how hard that was to get out without letting your voice crack and quiver? She could not respond, but I did hear her moan a little and Natalie said she heard me, so I know my message got through. I hope it gave her some peace. I hope it made a difference. I hope it will make her journey a little easier. I feel so guilty for praying daily that God will take her out of this misery knowing that what I really want is for her to be here with us. But you know, she is the lucky one. She gets to go and see what is on the other side. She gets to meet God and be in his presence. I told her while I had her on the phone today, to please put in a good word for me when she gets there cause I sure know I need all the help I can get and could sure use someone like her on my side up there! It wont be long now. I'm scared of the phone ringing. I dread that call but I almost wish it would come so she can be out of misery. Thank God Tina and the dh are here to get me through it. And so many of my friends that have sent emails and instant messages and what not. I want you all to know, I could NOT make it through this without each and every one of you.

I just wish I knew what was worse. Having to watch the one you love die slowly and painfully or having them torn out of your life suddenly? None of it is any good. There just isn't a good way. I also have to say that my thoughts and prayers go out to Cas. I can't even fathom what she is going through. For those of you that don't know, Cas' 20 yr old son passed away last Thursday. There are no words that can make that any easier and it makes you hurt that you can't take away that hurt or make it any easier. Cas, just know that there are alot of people out here that love you and we are all here for you at any time. We all ache for you and wish we could take away your pain.

We all need to be sure to appreciate our lives and the wonderful beautiful people that are sharing it with us. I have to say that I am extremely thankful to have my Tina back in my life. And to have her and Cameron under my roof has been a joy you cannot even imagine. I love seeing both of them smile and listen to them laugh. Tina has been my rock through this and I can't thank her or love her enough. I am truly blessed to have her in my life. Andrea has been there for me as well and I can't thank her enough. She's gotten me through some very hard times. And she's a great "myspace webmaster". :-) She has pimped my myspace page on so many occasions. I absolutely love it. And her of course. And Roger..........I can't say enough about Roger. He always, always makes me smile. However, I think I may lose him to Tina if they get together for shoe shopping. I'll never see either of them, the little shoe freaks!!! j/k

I love you guys and I am truly and unimagainbly blessed to have each and every one of you in my life.